Dealing with Emotions

Student Needs

• Self-awareness: their own, and on the part of the instructor
• Recognition that emotions are normal, and sometimes difficult to explain or contain
• Compassion tempered with reasonable expectations
• Understanding that emotional regulation may be impaired
• Gentle assistance in seeing how behaviour may be impacting others
• Respect that frustration can be high when students feel misunderstood, or believe that their experiences have been devalued, or they are embarrassed.

Solutions

• Stay calm; provide time and space to process feelings or express thoughts.
• Use empathy to acknowledge the emotion.
• Affirm that there are a wide range of possible emotional reactions, and there is nothing wrong with an authentic reaction.
• If you are concerned about behaviour in response to an emotional reaction, ask whether there are strategies the student has used in the past to cope.
• Help the student to feel grounded through the use of practical, information-oriented questions.
• Draw on resources when the situation is beyond your expertise.
• Personalize strengths, and depersonalize shortcomings (the problem is in the situation, not the person)
• Be aware that anxiety can sometimes look a lot like anger.  It’s helpful to see it as a product of a difficult situation rather than a personal criticism.

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